Happiness website

Happiness explained in a scientific way -

http://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/history-of-happiness/aristotle/

Acupuncture for Depression

I have just started acupuncture to treat my depression. I originally planned to have it just to reduce all the stress points in my body. However, I found out that the World Health Organization (WHO) actually recommends acupuncture fore Depression. Also, I have long wanted to stop depending on medicines. 

So, I set an appointment with an acupuncturist just within my work place making it accessible for me.

The doctor explained how different Depression is for the perspective of acupuncture. So, he said he

had to check first if I really do have it. He checked my pulses in my wrists. After a few seconds, he said, "Your psychiatrist must be good, he's right. You do have Depression." I don't know how he knew just by checking my pulses. He actually explained but I didn't understand. I just trusted him. He said, he can actually tell that my Depression has long been with me because he said it had reached my kidneys when normally Depression would only reach the heart and the lungs. 

After some talking, I was then prepared for the actual acupuncture. I lied down and felt (but not really) the needles pricking certain parts of my head, forehead, wrists, legs, and feet. It did not hurt at all. 

I don't know yet how this will affect me but I am looking forward to positive effects.

Hooray to the no-medicine lifestyle!

Oversleeping

Sleeping is my quick fix when I am feeling emotionally pained.

Sleeping isn't bad. It only becomes bad when it's overly done that accomplishing daily normal tasks are already affected. Oversleeping is actually one of the signs that one isn't okay. So, if you notice that a family or a friend tends to oversleep, do not immediately judge that that person is lazy - observe, talk, listen without judging, and just be there.

Being conscious

For the time that I have been writing about getting over depression, I realize that the ways to overcome it are actually very simple.

I have written about cleaning,

making art pieces,

nature-tripping, 

gardening,

running,











volunteering

eco-living,

and even spending time with loved ones

as forms of therapies.

These activities would seem ordinary for most people. But for those who are diagnosed with Depression, doing these activities would already be considered as victories. For the depressed, as simple as feeding oneself or taking a bath could be such a struggle. Going to work, doing errands, and all other normal daily tasks that would be easy in ordinary days would suddenly be such a pain to do!

So for someone who is depressed, to still carry on and do these necessary normal daily tasks is already worthy to be celebrated.

Aside from celebrating these small victories, again, do things that are therapeutic for you. When you do these, acknowledge that you are doing it to make yourself happy, to help yourself, and most importantly, to show care for yourself.

Depression has its ways to make yourself feel too bad about yourself, inflict unnecessary pain, and just slowly kill you! How depression manifests and destroys you is very important for as the cliche goes, knowledge is your best weapon.

Cleaning Therapy

I acknowledge that I need help. I know too that I cannot just bug people around me and tell them I need help. And when they found out that my need is company - they might just laugh it off.

Some needs just cannot be met.

So, today, I did one thing to help me shake off this disturbing chaos in my head.

This one thing that has always been therapeutic for me is cleaning! I love removing the dust off from surfaces, wiping them with my favorite Pledge, sweeping the floor with my broom whose strands shake like it's being tickled (Seriously, I smiled when I saw that while I was sweeping), and finally, mopping the floor with my Tornado 360 mop! This mop just made our lives so much easier - not to mention, cleaning so fun!

Now, that I am done with cleaning my little room - I will have to face again reality - that bugging disturbing chaos in my head. But at least now, I am facing it feeling a little lighter thanks to my cleaning therapy!

Signs

For anyone who is deeply concerned with someone who is depressed, you should know that there's no small feat for someone who's struggling with D. So, when your friend, family or loved one still tries VERY hard to do any of these things no matter how difficult it is for them - acknowledge it, affirm it, and make him/her feel good for doing it.

Those who are struggling with D will most likely experience one or two of the many possible symptoms:

• Difficulty in sleeping
• Difficulty in waking up
• Losing the energy to do small things - eating, standing up, bathing, changing clothes, doing proper hygiene
• Losing focus - studying or working
• Not wanting to go to school or work
• Avoiding people
• Avoiding crowds
• Smoking when he/she is not really a smoker
• And many more - check this website 
• http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/detecting-depression

Those above are based only on my experience so please do more research if you are serious about helping your loved one cope with depression.

Nobody knows when.

So I have not been okay.

Since I have not been okay, I am back here - blogging. Blogging seems to be my only constant company during my loneliness. It never leaves me no matter how many times I would leave and go on with my life.

Just like any episode of depression, I would have to figure out the root of all these demons.

It started maybe in February of this year. I came back to my dorm without my roommate's stuff - she left. She decided to stay at her own place despite the distance from her work. It dawned on me that I would not be looking forward to having someone to talk to at the end of the day anymore since I would be alone.

Then, my long-term relationship started to shake when my partner told me he still couldn't see himself settling down anytime soon. We nearly broke up. But we didn't.

That unsettled issue, naturally, haunted us again. When we had to deal with our differences, he just confirmed what he said weeks before - that he's not ready, that he has just started finding what's really for him, and that he couldn't see himself in what I pictured to be our future. Writing what we talked about seems more real and thus, more painful. Hearing from him all these things was both relieving and enraging. It was relieving because at least I know now where I stand (something I have long wondered). It was enraging because now that everything seems okay with him, it seems he can just let me go. But now, that I don't seem to have anything stable, I'm being left by myself. It dawned on me that I would not be looking forward to anything with him anymore. He doesn't want to make any plans.

While he was saying all that, I was imagining all those men who gave up their personal desires or dreams to be with that one person they love - I remember my brothers, I remember my friends' husbands, I remember those men, few men apparently... Giving up their personal goals didn't mean they didn't get to achieve those anymore. It just meant they weren't alone anymore in achieving their goals. I know. I know because I saw how my brothers seemed better men because of their wives and their children. All these men I know, one common thing they all shared, I noticed - they had nothing. My brother was dependent on my parents for the wedding expenses. Another brother was even broke while he was organizing the wedding. He said, he and my sister-in-law started with a debt. But look at them now, they are more than well-off. Two of my friends' husbands were jobless when they got married. They said, they just wanted to be together - forever. Now, that's love.

I was imagining I would end up with that kind of man as well... someone who would stand up for me, someone who would believe in our partnership - that together we can accomplish all that we dream of.

Now, one foot is still in my relationship but one foot is already out - wanting to be free. I know I don't deserve to be with a man who couldn't commit himself to me - someone who would just make me wait until nobody knows when.

So, these what make me not okay... not okay, until when?

Nobody knows when.